not myself

to my dearest friends and others who read this little blog of mine.
thank you for all your kind words and advice. i want you to know that although im hurting like i didn't think could be physically possible- just know i will be ok. im taking it day by day, although at the moment it feels like an eternity. im sorry that my energy is extremely low. and im sorry if i move away when an embrace lasts too long. im trying to heal and it will take time. im also sorry that some of you feel a bit of the pain i feel. last thing i want is for anyone else to feel this. my posts will be on the downer side, even though i was supposed to become more positive. im doing by best to look at the positive side of this situation but it's difficult. all i can say is it's going to take time so just hold on. i also apologise if i distant myself from you, i just hate being a burden on people. ive never been one to let people see me hurt or in pain so i become distant. it's something im working on. but at the moment im not myself. and im sorry you all have to see me like this. i appreciate you all and im so thankful and blessed to have you all in my life. so thank you for baring with me, but please don't feel the need to take on my pain. it's my mess i'll work through it. i truly do love you all. and im sorry if i say the word love half-heartedly now. because at the moment my heart is associating love with pain. but i do truly love you all. once again sorry for being such a downer...