attack

at·tack  (-tk)

v. at·tacked, at·tack·ing, at·tacks

v.tr.

1. To set upon with violent force.

3. To start work on with purpose and vigor: attack a problem.

n.

4.

a. The initial movement in a task or undertaking: made an optimistic attack on the pile of paperwork.

b. A method or procedure: Our attack on this project will have two phases.

6. The experience or beginning of a feeling, need, or desire: an attack of hunger; an attack of melancholy.

last year I felt as though my family and I were under attack. we kept getting thrown into unpleasant situations that i wish upon no one. It only made me stronger though. I never thought I was a weak individual, of course physically I'm not the strongest person but mentally I am, I simply was unaware of how strong I actually am. it wasn't till this year when i stopped and looked at all that i had survived and accomplished that i realized the full potential of my strength and endurance.

I've withstood quite a bit in my life and rarely let situations/statistics determine the outcome of my life. example being part of a 'broken' family; my parents separated when i was 9/10 and divorced several years later (although I assumed they had divorced when they were separated since they no longer lived in the same home and had significant others). My father was a drunk, and my mother was stubborn and filled with anger (from her childhood and then failed marriage). according to statistics, take a gander here http://www.children-and-divorce.com/children-divorce-statistics.html, I should have been lonely, unhappy, aggressive towards others, unpleasant to be around, had poor grades or dropped out of school entirely, committed suicide, and/or should have psychological problems. And to be honest if it weren't for God's grace and love in my life I probably would have been a mere statistic but I'm not. I refuse to be. Yes I am a reserved individual but i'm also outgoing and fun once im comfortable in my surrounding. I've maintained an A average throughout elementary school, high school, and university (all with the exception of math and certain sciences but i had difficulties with those subjects before the divorce). Also i've broken the chain in my family and graduated highschool, my moms family didnt nor did my father. that's just a little glimpse of how i've learned to reverse what society says i should be and do what God has for me. Another road block would be the struggles with finances we've faced for about 6 years. We've been on welfare, had food hampers given to us at one point, came close to loosing our home in various ocasions, lived in a very poor and unsafe area of town because it was all we could afford, and at the moment both my mom and I are unemployed- yet we still have a roof over our head (and a nice one for that matter). that is the miracle of God because society says due to those circumstances we should be on the streets and we are not. I don't quite know where im going with this but sometimes i feel the need to share certain things from my past on here, who knows maybe someone needs to hear that no matter what life throws at you, with god you can overcome it all. our problem or situation may seem like a mountain or a giant but to god it's a mere ant. and he can and will help us overcome it. i will not be a statistic, especially one of failure.

this year i feel as though im attacking life. i have an attack of desire and purpose now. and it's not attack as in im gonna hunt someone down and harm them, it's an attack as in a movement/force of action (like the above descriptions of the word). i don't feel passive anymore, done being shoved into uncomfortable circumstances im ready to actually do something with my life. i always have been. i feel as though these past years were just me sharpening my talons and strengthen my wings, learning how to be quick and agile for this moment in life. as though all those circumstances have been a way to prepare me to attack. i feel ready now. i don't know what's to come but im ready to attack. im ready for success. i have a thirst for life like never before.